A Dose of Snarry
by Inari K
Summary: Even Snarry needs to be made fun of. (SSHP)


To Maddy (my muse),

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter. JK Rowling does.

**Warning:** This fic is a is a big pile of cliche's. I love Snarry dearly, but sometimes you just have to make fun of it!

**A Dose of Snarry**

"Potter. I'm old enough to be your father."

"I know sir. But Voldermort is out to kill me and I want to loose my virginity to a father figure."

Snape nodded his head reassuringly. "Well now, that I understand."

"Now that every things settled..." Harry ran a suggestive hand up Snape's torso.

"Of course Potter. Please step into my chambers." Snape pulled his new and sensual lover inside his humble abode. He smothered Harry in kisses while dragging the boy to his bedroom. He started to remove his robes when Harry stopped him.

"Sir, I've been waiting for this day ever since I realized that your voice was one of a Sex God, and your arse looked great in form fitting leather pants; the ones that you wore on that 6th year Potions class on March 28th.

"But Severus, if I may so call you, I really want to shag in your classroom. It has been a hidden desire of mine for you to pop my cherry while looking demeaning, as you bend me over Draco Malfoy's desk."

Snape gave a seductive half smile. "Of course Harry." Severus did a mental blink. When did he start to think of Potter as Harry?

Shelving that thought in the depths of his mind, he swept the boy off his feet and carried him through a secret door that remarkable lead the two to the Potions classroom. "Is this to your liking?"

"Oh yes." The-boy-who-was-about-to-be-shagged squealed. He bounded out of Snape's arms and flung himself on a desk and spread his legs wide open, waiting for his older lover to make a move.

"Wait Harry. Before we begin making-love, I must tell you I harboured homoerotic feelings towards Sirius, Remus, Peter and your father. That is why I hated them so."

Harry let out a little gasp.

"Also I slept with Lucius to compensate for my lack of self-esteem. That and Sirius and Remus wouldn't have a threesome with me."

Harry tried to stifle a sob and opened up his arms to embrace manic depressive!Sev. "You poor greasy Potions Master."

Severus embraced Harry back, and stifled his own heart felt sob.

Severus soon broke free(after a good cry) and began to disrobe once again; Harry following suit. Cloths ridden, both men gazed hungrily at each others well chiseled abs.

"Oh Severus! I thought you were going to be a little more thin and pasty! I'm so glad you work out and use a bronzer on your hard abs!"

Severus gave a little twirl to show off his fab bod. "That's not all. I have been wearing a strong glamour spell on my face." The Potions Master waved his wand, undoing the glamour spell.

A gorgeous man with dark obsidian eyes, long wispy un-greasy hair and a un-broken nose(with well chiseled abs)stood before Harry.

"Wow. I never would have expected you to be this handsome!" Harry gushed.

"I'm full of sexy surprises. I'm also not at all snarky. It was all a ploy to win Voldermort's trust. I am really a very kind and loving soul. Not mean or harsh at all. I also have a very romantic side to me. Even though I mentioned I slept with Lucius before, it was all a lie. I'm a bashful virgin like you! I've been waiting for a person like you to unleash my burning passion!"

"Oh Severus!" Harry cried.

Unleashing his passion, Severus pounced on Harry and defiled him like any good teacher would.

After loads of great sex, the two men lay on Draco Malfoy's desk, perspire gleaming off their bodies.

"Oh Severus I wish we could stay like this forever. Unfortunately I have class to attend tomorrow."

"Oh Harry, don't leave yet." Severus clutched his boyfriend tighter.

"But what if Dumbledore sees us?"

The now 10x hotter Severus chuckled. "Don't worry Harry, Albus has been plotting for us to get together for a long time. I've read his "Snarry" files. He wants me to fall in love with you while you are still a student at Hogwarts."

The-boy-who-was-now-fully-shagged smirked. "Well then..."

"Another fantasy Potter?"

"Mmm hmm. Lets have sex in the Gryffindor chambers! The trill of being caught is just to much!"

Severus swooned "Oh I love how your mind works my love. I am your love slave."

Harry grinned. This night would surely make his arse hurt for a week.

**The End!!!!!**


End file.
